Metallica returned to Jakarta for the first time in 20 years on the last night of their Asian tour.
The governor of Jakarta is a huge fan and the riots that marked their last visit a blip in the past. Sixty thousand well behaved rockers of every variety sang every word from every song for two hours: the boys on stage seemed genuinely impressed though frankly, having that many irony-illiterate people punching the air and chanting "OBEY YOUR MASTER... MASTER" gave me the creeps.
I've been to a few large concerts here and while folks are very appreciative of the artists and knowledgeable about their work, here's a desperate need for some training in "rock and roll concert literacy". And so, the
Grinch's Rules for Jakarta concert-goers (and organizers):
1. If the lead singer brings the song to a crescendo and raises his hand to the sound of a lone wailing guitar, it is time to make some %!@&#?!!ing noise.
2. If you want encores, make some %!@&#?!!ing noise.
3. Beach balls and Frisbees, yes; Roman candles, no.
4. Girls rock; bring them. Anyone gives them trouble, trouble them back (with interest).
5. Festival “seating” off the floor is a deadly idea; sell seats, not access.
6. Go home if you wanna play video games on your phone.
7. Under no circumstances do you applaud the arrival a politician.
8. If you buy bootleg music/t-shirts/swag etc. then go spend some money on the real thing.
9. Don’t make James Hetfield (or anyone else who’s putting it out there) beg; See Rules 1 & 2.
10. Chant “IN-DO-NE-SIA” at football matches, not heavy metal shows.
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