Decisions, decisions....
Today was election day in Aceh. Early accounts suggest voter turnout was in the high 70s but little solid news on numbers till the first exit polls are released at 8 pm local.
The world's press are scuttling about analyzing the heck out of the situation and trying to figure out What It Means if the GAM slate comes out on top.
Quite extraordinary past few days, scenes unimaginable in Dec 2004 - driving home late Saturday, a light red wine buzz on smoking a #3 Romeo & Juliet with Herbie Hancock lowering the bass-line boom out the back of our midnight blue Kijang, the streets choked with young people on motorcycles doing what young people do; looking for dark corners to smoke and canoodle while dodging the authorities, in this case the religious police; the roadside burger stands packed to capacity with anxious, chain-smoking boys in prized Heavy Metal t-shirts eyeing girls backing 28" rear-ends into 24" Levis; families gathered in Banda Aceh back road kampungs to chat and swat mosquitoes, Mums heaping plate-loads of food in front of disinterested yoots; cops lounging, knee high faux-leather biker boots atop the handlebars of the their motorcycles looking for reasons ignore traffic infractions; tiny shop-house grocery-caves ablaze in kerosene light where the local power has died yet again while smoke coils from a hundreds small garbage fires.
I'm exhausted and exhilarated. Two months of seven-day weeks planning for the year-end came down to last week and this. Juggling journos and job interviews, starting the process of packing two years of my life into plastic boxes, finalizing all the paperwork debts and dues. Today was a bit of an off day on account of the elections so I started shutting down my office. There's already two large cardboard boxes loaded with papers and junk waiting for the tip tomorrow. My drawers are empty of all but a couple of paperclips, an orange highlighter and a shell I picked up in Lhokna that doubles as an ashtray. All my travel claims are ready and by tomorrow I'll have all the security guard declarations completed and it'll be time to tackle the filing cabinet.
The Han and I are scheduled to leave for the Great White North on the 20th or 21st for about a month. Do some skiing, catch the Habs live, maybe check out the Grinch's new cave if there's time. Then back to the Big Durian to sort out the next phase of our lives.
I'm feeling like a third party observer to my own life at the moment, utterly detached but living in the anger. Almost manic, cracking jokes, entertaining and no one but me can hear the fuse slowing burning. I have to keep moving. The rage still keeps me up nights: Black Label blunts it but I'm no child and that's a hell of a way to go.
There's rumors of a reprieve but frankly it would be better if I were not presented with that option. Folks seem to think that if a call comes from the warden at midnight on Dec 31st that I'm going to do cartwheels. And it is just not the case. Right now, staying with this outfit will be far harder than leaving for good.