Mr. Gloom & Doonesbury
I was going to put a few words together about how the political in-fighting within the Free Aceh Movement (GAM) has reached a head in recent days and the Old Guard loyalists to the Swedish and Malaysian exiles are now on a collision course with the Young Guard, the guys who didn’t run but stuck it out here through decades of bloodshed and repression.
Sounds vaguely familiar: I’m no expert bit I don’t know a post-conflict situation where similar schisms haven’t emerged.
I was going to write about how there has been a marked increase in shakedowns, truck-jackings and robberies and how guys with handles like Rambo and Deadheart are unwrapping their oiled and cached weapons – by some estimates as many as 1,200 were not decommissioned post-peace deal – and running amok with the tacit support of their commanders while the European Union organ AMM works diligently to whitewash the whole situation in the interests of personal and professional expediency.
I was going to write about how on the eve of the elections (that among other things will set the two GAM factions against one another for the governor’s job much to the glee of the existing power structures) all the prerequisites are in place for the emergence of the perfect storm: the hot winds of a fragmented, armed independence movement colliding with the cooled expectations of homeless, unemployable, landless and poorly represented populations (who may or may not be who they claim-plenty fraud out there) two years after the tsunami.
But I’ll leave further explorations of that gloomy prospect for another night. For now, I’ll direct you to The Sandbox, (http://gocomics.typepad.com/the_sandbox) a creation of Doonesbury illustrator Gary Trudeau, a forum not unlike a blog, where ordinary US servicemen and women can post their thoughts and experiences.
Today’s postings include one soldier’s description of being mortared while on guard duty in Iraq; an American soldier in Afghanistan writes about his admiration for his civilian translators and an officer stateside contrasts Cheney’s visit to his base with his job at the time, packing the worldly possessions of a dead 23-year-old female soldier into boxes to be sent to her family.
Gripping stuff.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Friday, October 13, 2006
Sexy SI Bikini Girls Oil Up In The Tsunami-Zone?
Grinch’s spies report the arrival in Banda Aceh of supermodel tsunami-survivor Petra Nemcova in with a support gaggle of stork-legged young belles and enough camera gear to outfit a small nation.
The Czech 2006 Sports Illustrated Magazine covergirl was vacationing in Phuket, Thailand, when the tsunami struck. Her boyfriend photographer was among those killed. She suffered a broken pelvis and spent several hours in a tree before being rescued.
So will the lovely Perta and chums oil up for a shoot aboard the beached PLN Electrical barge, among survivors at a local barrack or perhaps in the ruins of mosque? All enquires should be directed to you friendly, neighborhood Syariah law enforcement unit because her personal soft-porn website has very little information.
Aceh has seen its fair share of celebs since Dec. 2004 though mercifully aging opportunists like boy-toy Ricky Martin gave us a wide berth. I seem to remember ManU football star Chrisiano Ronaldo swunf by on a three-hour whistle-stop pausing long enough for the cameras to catch him kicking around a soccer ball with a select group of kids before jetting off to Bali to shoot a Powerdrink commercial.
Nemcova has created a fund-raising organ called the Happy Hearts Fund which, if I understand the hype, is administered by a charity called Give2Asia (which I’ve never heard of) but apparently was created by The Asia Foundation. Hmmm. Wonder if they’re the one’s organizing this trip?
The HHF’s focus is “to aid children who have suffered from natural disasters”. They held a fundraiser last week in the US (gimped tennis diva Serena Williams etc) around the release of a coffee table book called the Big Red Book, which is described thus: ... features iconic personalities and ordinary people who have made extraordinary contributions. The coffee table book has been photographed by well-known photographers that use the thematic exploration of the color red via poetry, photography and art.
Huh?
HHF claims to have donated $130,000 to a Thai foundation that built a dorm for 80 school kids, another $38,000 to a Thai university “for psychological and emotional programs for children in tsunami-affected areas”n and $12,000 for Orphan Aid (whozat?) to support 20 kids.
Grinch’s spies report the arrival in Banda Aceh of supermodel tsunami-survivor Petra Nemcova in with a support gaggle of stork-legged young belles and enough camera gear to outfit a small nation.
The Czech 2006 Sports Illustrated Magazine covergirl was vacationing in Phuket, Thailand, when the tsunami struck. Her boyfriend photographer was among those killed. She suffered a broken pelvis and spent several hours in a tree before being rescued.
So will the lovely Perta and chums oil up for a shoot aboard the beached PLN Electrical barge, among survivors at a local barrack or perhaps in the ruins of mosque? All enquires should be directed to you friendly, neighborhood Syariah law enforcement unit because her personal soft-porn website has very little information.
Aceh has seen its fair share of celebs since Dec. 2004 though mercifully aging opportunists like boy-toy Ricky Martin gave us a wide berth. I seem to remember ManU football star Chrisiano Ronaldo swunf by on a three-hour whistle-stop pausing long enough for the cameras to catch him kicking around a soccer ball with a select group of kids before jetting off to Bali to shoot a Powerdrink commercial.
Nemcova has created a fund-raising organ called the Happy Hearts Fund which, if I understand the hype, is administered by a charity called Give2Asia (which I’ve never heard of) but apparently was created by The Asia Foundation. Hmmm. Wonder if they’re the one’s organizing this trip?
The HHF’s focus is “to aid children who have suffered from natural disasters”. They held a fundraiser last week in the US (gimped tennis diva Serena Williams etc) around the release of a coffee table book called the Big Red Book, which is described thus: ... features iconic personalities and ordinary people who have made extraordinary contributions. The coffee table book has been photographed by well-known photographers that use the thematic exploration of the color red via poetry, photography and art.
Huh?
HHF claims to have donated $130,000 to a Thai foundation that built a dorm for 80 school kids, another $38,000 to a Thai university “for psychological and emotional programs for children in tsunami-affected areas”n and $12,000 for Orphan Aid (whozat?) to support 20 kids.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Samaritan's Purse Orders Out of North Sumatra
Medan, North Sumatra, Oct 3 (ANTARA) - Indonesia`s social affairs minister has issued an instruction asking a foreign non-governmental organization (NGO), Samaritan`s Purse, to immediately leave North Sumatra, for illegal practice of converting people`s faith in the province.
"The social affairs minister has issued an order for Samaritan`s Purse to leave immediately and stop operating in North Sumatra," Raden Muhammad Syafi`i, chairman of the Reform Star Party (PBR) faction at the North Sumatra regional legislative council (DPRD), said here on Tuesday.
Syafi`i said that he got the information about the instruction from the ministry`s director general for social development, Gazali H. Situmorang, when they met in Jakarta, last Saturday (Sept 30).
"So, in the future, Samaritan`s Purse is allowed to operate only in East Nusa Tenggara," he said. The US-based NGO has been spreading certain religious teachings under a disguise of humanitarian mission, he said. Syafi`i was of the view that a number of foreign NGOs operating in Indonesia had claimed that they were on humanitarian mission, while they were actually bringing other missions. "They are also loaded with certain missions, including converting people to a particular belief, as what have allegedly done by 12 foreign NGOs in Aceh," he said.
The North Sumatra DPRD called managers of Samaritan`s Purse last September 18, 2006, following complaints by some people on the activities of the NGO.
If true, this story carried by the national news wire Antara is significant as it is the first time I am aware of of a foreign agency being thrown out of N Sumatra province for preaching since the tsunami. SP is working on Nias island - which is predominantly Christian/animist - and has operations in Meulaboh, Aceh Barat and several other districts here in Aceh province. If they are being tossed out of Nias then one has to wonder how long they'll be allowed to remain in Aceh, which as we all know is 99 percent Muslim. I understand they make a mean cheese-cake and pizza at the Meulaboh office.
Also significant as SP has connections at the highest levels in Washington- headed by Franklin Graham (son of presidential confessor Billy) who is perhaps best known outside Evangelical circles for popping out of his hole long enough to describe Islam as a "very evil and wicked religion".
Actually, the full quote is: "We're not attacking Islam but Islam has attacked us. The God of Islam is not the same God. He's not the son of God of the Christian or Judeo-Christian faith. It's a different God, and I believe it is a very evil and wicked religion."
I was a little surprised they are allowed to stay this long but the tsunami did attract a diverse set of characters. I have had a few peripheral dealings with SP, particularly in Nias where their chopper was instrumental in providing medical services to remote areas in the wake of the March 2005 earthquake. No doubt they saved lives.
At the same time, if the allegations of proselytizing - a criminal offence in Indonesia that mobs have used to rationalize violent attacks on minority Muslim sects - are true it is extremely serious. Plays into the hands of the hardcore minority who see the 'defence of Islam against Crusader influences' as Job One.
More as events unfold.
Medan, North Sumatra, Oct 3 (ANTARA) - Indonesia`s social affairs minister has issued an instruction asking a foreign non-governmental organization (NGO), Samaritan`s Purse, to immediately leave North Sumatra, for illegal practice of converting people`s faith in the province.
"The social affairs minister has issued an order for Samaritan`s Purse to leave immediately and stop operating in North Sumatra," Raden Muhammad Syafi`i, chairman of the Reform Star Party (PBR) faction at the North Sumatra regional legislative council (DPRD), said here on Tuesday.
Syafi`i said that he got the information about the instruction from the ministry`s director general for social development, Gazali H. Situmorang, when they met in Jakarta, last Saturday (Sept 30).
"So, in the future, Samaritan`s Purse is allowed to operate only in East Nusa Tenggara," he said. The US-based NGO has been spreading certain religious teachings under a disguise of humanitarian mission, he said. Syafi`i was of the view that a number of foreign NGOs operating in Indonesia had claimed that they were on humanitarian mission, while they were actually bringing other missions. "They are also loaded with certain missions, including converting people to a particular belief, as what have allegedly done by 12 foreign NGOs in Aceh," he said.
The North Sumatra DPRD called managers of Samaritan`s Purse last September 18, 2006, following complaints by some people on the activities of the NGO.
If true, this story carried by the national news wire Antara is significant as it is the first time I am aware of of a foreign agency being thrown out of N Sumatra province for preaching since the tsunami. SP is working on Nias island - which is predominantly Christian/animist - and has operations in Meulaboh, Aceh Barat and several other districts here in Aceh province. If they are being tossed out of Nias then one has to wonder how long they'll be allowed to remain in Aceh, which as we all know is 99 percent Muslim. I understand they make a mean cheese-cake and pizza at the Meulaboh office.
Also significant as SP has connections at the highest levels in Washington- headed by Franklin Graham (son of presidential confessor Billy) who is perhaps best known outside Evangelical circles for popping out of his hole long enough to describe Islam as a "very evil and wicked religion".
Actually, the full quote is: "We're not attacking Islam but Islam has attacked us. The God of Islam is not the same God. He's not the son of God of the Christian or Judeo-Christian faith. It's a different God, and I believe it is a very evil and wicked religion."
I was a little surprised they are allowed to stay this long but the tsunami did attract a diverse set of characters. I have had a few peripheral dealings with SP, particularly in Nias where their chopper was instrumental in providing medical services to remote areas in the wake of the March 2005 earthquake. No doubt they saved lives.
At the same time, if the allegations of proselytizing - a criminal offence in Indonesia that mobs have used to rationalize violent attacks on minority Muslim sects - are true it is extremely serious. Plays into the hands of the hardcore minority who see the 'defence of Islam against Crusader influences' as Job One.
More as events unfold.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Creepy Dead Baby Recruitment Efforts
The following item from The Times (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-2387589,00.html) must qualify as the creepiest item of the day:
THE Pope will cast aside centuries of Catholic belief later this week by abolishing formally the concept of limbo, in a gesture calculated to help to win the souls of millions of babies in the developing world for Christ.
All the evidence suggests that Benedict XVI never believed in the idea anyway. But in the fertile evangelisation zones of Africa and Asia, the Pope — an acknowledged authority on all things Islamic — is only too aware that Muslims believe the souls of stillborn babies go straight to Heaven. For the Church, looking to spread the faith in countries with a high infant mortality rate, now is a good time to make it absolutely clear that stillborn babies of Christian mothers go direct to Heaven, too.
The Pope is expected to abolish only “limbus infantium”, where the souls of unbaptised infants go. The precise status of “limbus patrum”, where the good people went who lived before Christ remains . . . well, in limbo.
Is it just me or is the competition for savable souls getting just a wee bit wacky? What next, microwave ovens and redeemable frequent flier miles for new converts?
This will presumably provide fertile ground for comic relief but there's at least one prankster out there who'll have to give this one a close look. In his seminal album - yes, ALBUM... black disky containing recorded data - Class Clown, George Carlin riffs on Heaven, Hell, Purgatory and Limbo. This a few tracks after The Seven Words You Can't Say on Television, which to this day I can (and do) quote chapter and verse. It all seems so genteel now but back in the 70s - when attending a Life of Brian matinee (We-wees Wodewick!) was considered grounds for excommunication - Carlin, Richard Pryor and other graduates of the Lenny Bruce school of social criticism were considered dangerous men.
If the Pope really wants to ramp up the numbers in developing countries he might consider lowering the conversion bar. Most Evangelists just wanna dunk people, the conversion to Islam is only slightly more difficult than getting a video membership card (Recite the Testament of Faith in Arabic before a cleric and it's 'Welcome Aboard'), and Mormons will do for you retroactively after you - and your entire line - are centuries dead.
I recommend drive-through conversions tied into an election-registration program. Resign yourself to a certain vision of the thereafter and take a degree of control over the here-and-now at the same time.
Forgive me, I'm ten days into the fast and feeling a bit lightheaded. Monday was tough; pretty much ready to chew through my seatbelt on the drive to Pizza House (a straight rip-of of Pizza Hut located in the centre of Banda Aceh) to break the fast with a large House Pepperoni with extra-cheese and strawberry milkshake. I really feel for the kids who work there. How tough is it to be preparing food when you haven't had a thing since 430 am?
Word @ Pasar Aceh
- Talk on the street is that the Shariyah enforcement androids want to close down Caswells sandwich shop, one of only two places where the infidels can eat during daylight hours.
- Our lovely cleaning lady at the Banda Aceh office lost her husband yesterday. He was helping a neighbor work on the house and somehow electrocuted himself. She's got four kids under the age of 16.
- Will break fast at the office in 48 minutes and 23 seconds, 22 seconds, 21 seconds... as one of our international staff is returning to Japan. Then off the Italian restaurant for overcooked linguini.
- Grinch Lair has been rewired for wireless Internet. Boys climbed up the mast outside the kitchen (dead owner, the former Regent of North Aceh, was a ham radio nut) and now we've got better connection speeds than folks in Singapore. Full package costs about $90/month. Joy. No excuse not to work 24/7 now.
- Alerted teman-teman in bulk e-mail that the Blog is alive. Also advised about the following Grinch cameo appearance: Earlier this year I helped the folks at a London production house shoot a reenactment for the show ‘Seconds From Disaster’. My role as 'Anonymous Technician #2: Guy with Measuring Tape’ is being described as "a gripping tour-de-farce" – MSNBC; "complex… allegorical" - S Hawking; "Reminiscent of Brando and other complicated fat guys.." – The Drudge Report; "Hoo-Mammy-Tsunami!!!" - Hollywood Insider.
‘Asian Tsunami’ is going to air on National Geographic Channel in the US on the 25th October at 9pm, and again on the 28th October at 3pm. No word on broadcasts north of the 49th parallel or abroad.
The following item from The Times (http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-2387589,00.html) must qualify as the creepiest item of the day:
THE Pope will cast aside centuries of Catholic belief later this week by abolishing formally the concept of limbo, in a gesture calculated to help to win the souls of millions of babies in the developing world for Christ.
All the evidence suggests that Benedict XVI never believed in the idea anyway. But in the fertile evangelisation zones of Africa and Asia, the Pope — an acknowledged authority on all things Islamic — is only too aware that Muslims believe the souls of stillborn babies go straight to Heaven. For the Church, looking to spread the faith in countries with a high infant mortality rate, now is a good time to make it absolutely clear that stillborn babies of Christian mothers go direct to Heaven, too.
The Pope is expected to abolish only “limbus infantium”, where the souls of unbaptised infants go. The precise status of “limbus patrum”, where the good people went who lived before Christ remains . . . well, in limbo.
Is it just me or is the competition for savable souls getting just a wee bit wacky? What next, microwave ovens and redeemable frequent flier miles for new converts?
This will presumably provide fertile ground for comic relief but there's at least one prankster out there who'll have to give this one a close look. In his seminal album - yes, ALBUM... black disky containing recorded data - Class Clown, George Carlin riffs on Heaven, Hell, Purgatory and Limbo. This a few tracks after The Seven Words You Can't Say on Television, which to this day I can (and do) quote chapter and verse. It all seems so genteel now but back in the 70s - when attending a Life of Brian matinee (We-wees Wodewick!) was considered grounds for excommunication - Carlin, Richard Pryor and other graduates of the Lenny Bruce school of social criticism were considered dangerous men.
If the Pope really wants to ramp up the numbers in developing countries he might consider lowering the conversion bar. Most Evangelists just wanna dunk people, the conversion to Islam is only slightly more difficult than getting a video membership card (Recite the Testament of Faith in Arabic before a cleric and it's 'Welcome Aboard'), and Mormons will do for you retroactively after you - and your entire line - are centuries dead.
I recommend drive-through conversions tied into an election-registration program. Resign yourself to a certain vision of the thereafter and take a degree of control over the here-and-now at the same time.
Forgive me, I'm ten days into the fast and feeling a bit lightheaded. Monday was tough; pretty much ready to chew through my seatbelt on the drive to Pizza House (a straight rip-of of Pizza Hut located in the centre of Banda Aceh) to break the fast with a large House Pepperoni with extra-cheese and strawberry milkshake. I really feel for the kids who work there. How tough is it to be preparing food when you haven't had a thing since 430 am?
Word @ Pasar Aceh
- Talk on the street is that the Shariyah enforcement androids want to close down Caswells sandwich shop, one of only two places where the infidels can eat during daylight hours.
- Our lovely cleaning lady at the Banda Aceh office lost her husband yesterday. He was helping a neighbor work on the house and somehow electrocuted himself. She's got four kids under the age of 16.
- Will break fast at the office in 48 minutes and 23 seconds, 22 seconds, 21 seconds... as one of our international staff is returning to Japan. Then off the Italian restaurant for overcooked linguini.
- Grinch Lair has been rewired for wireless Internet. Boys climbed up the mast outside the kitchen (dead owner, the former Regent of North Aceh, was a ham radio nut) and now we've got better connection speeds than folks in Singapore. Full package costs about $90/month. Joy. No excuse not to work 24/7 now.
- Alerted teman-teman in bulk e-mail that the Blog is alive. Also advised about the following Grinch cameo appearance: Earlier this year I helped the folks at a London production house shoot a reenactment for the show ‘Seconds From Disaster’. My role as 'Anonymous Technician #2: Guy with Measuring Tape’ is being described as "a gripping tour-de-farce" – MSNBC; "complex… allegorical" - S Hawking; "Reminiscent of Brando and other complicated fat guys.." – The Drudge Report; "Hoo-Mammy-Tsunami!!!" - Hollywood Insider.
‘Asian Tsunami’ is going to air on National Geographic Channel in the US on the 25th October at 9pm, and again on the 28th October at 3pm. No word on broadcasts north of the 49th parallel or abroad.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Ex-Guard Begging Whup-Ass: Redux
As expected, the saga of the thieving guard drags on.
Only in Indonesia (or in this case Aceh) does a guy who is paid to protect your home and then turns around and thieves from you, charge you with slander after he is fired.
Rommie got notice a short while ago that he's expected at Banda Aceh headquarters to answer slander charges.
I suppose we can look forward to further fun and games in coming weeks including a possible summons to the Grinch. Yeah Baby! Pic on the front page of the newspaper! Check here for further updates...
All pales in comparison to news from abroad about the psycho who barricaded himself in a single-room Amish schoolhouse and sharted executing girls aged eight-12. A dozen children in hospital, four dead along with the suspect, a milkman described as a "quiet man" and "a good father."
This is the third school shooting in the States in the past ten days. Last week in Colorado a guy did the same thing but molested the girls first. One teen and the gunman dead when cops burst through the door.
Meanwhile the Repubican congressman who co-chairs the House Caucus on Missing and Exploited Children, has resigned for sending explict emails and sms' to teenage pages at his office. He claims he is a depressed alky and has checked into rehab. His former colleagues are putting as much daylight as possible between themselves and Mark Foley saying they had no idea. Presumably they did know he was an alcoholic but that it wasn't serious enough to effect his performance as a lawmaker for the past 12 years.
One day it's all gonna be too much and I'm going to leave the news behind. The psychic weight is becoming unbearable. Now that I've got my country bolthole - five acres and love shack in coastal BC signed, sealed and delivered Sept 1 - it is even more do-able.
As expected, the saga of the thieving guard drags on.
Only in Indonesia (or in this case Aceh) does a guy who is paid to protect your home and then turns around and thieves from you, charge you with slander after he is fired.
Rommie got notice a short while ago that he's expected at Banda Aceh headquarters to answer slander charges.
I suppose we can look forward to further fun and games in coming weeks including a possible summons to the Grinch. Yeah Baby! Pic on the front page of the newspaper! Check here for further updates...
All pales in comparison to news from abroad about the psycho who barricaded himself in a single-room Amish schoolhouse and sharted executing girls aged eight-12. A dozen children in hospital, four dead along with the suspect, a milkman described as a "quiet man" and "a good father."
This is the third school shooting in the States in the past ten days. Last week in Colorado a guy did the same thing but molested the girls first. One teen and the gunman dead when cops burst through the door.
Meanwhile the Repubican congressman who co-chairs the House Caucus on Missing and Exploited Children, has resigned for sending explict emails and sms' to teenage pages at his office. He claims he is a depressed alky and has checked into rehab. His former colleagues are putting as much daylight as possible between themselves and Mark Foley saying they had no idea. Presumably they did know he was an alcoholic but that it wasn't serious enough to effect his performance as a lawmaker for the past 12 years.
One day it's all gonna be too much and I'm going to leave the news behind. The psychic weight is becoming unbearable. Now that I've got my country bolthole - five acres and love shack in coastal BC signed, sealed and delivered Sept 1 - it is even more do-able.
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